Building Culture – One Conversation at a Time

Based on my coaching sessions with entrepreneur-business owners, I can tell you that culture is a significant issue to those entrepreneurs. That makes total sense. Culture is extremely personal to an entrepreneur because of how the entrepreneur sees their business and business culture as a reflection of himself/herself. The famously quoted “Godfather” business line – “it’s not personal, it’s just business” – just does not apply well in the reality of entrepreneur-owned business.  It’s ALL personal.

When it does come up in conversation, we inevitably go back to the question, “How is culture formed in an entrepreneur-driven business?” The culture is based on the entrepreneur’s values, decisions, actions, habits, and perhaps most importantly, every single conversation that the entrepreneur has with members of their organization.

Let that sink in a minute. My goal here is to get you focused on the conversations you have in the work environment and how you can be intentional in your conversations with regard to the culture you want to model and reinforce. Yes, there are other important things you can do to reinforce culture – creating and sharing core values with the team, keeping those values in mind when teams are making decisions, celebrating those values in different ways – however, the single most influential driver on the culture of your entrepreneur-driven company are the words coming out of your mouth.

Conversations Tips, not Culture Tips

One things I am not going to do, and can’t do, is give you any specific tips on how to build the culture you want since I have no idea what culture each of you want to build. However, I believe I can provide two helpful things – (a) some specific tips you can consider to ensure that you reinforce that culture you choose, and (b) some suggestions within those tips that assists you reinforce a culture that includes the openness and engagement that is essential within a successful entrepreneurial environment. Entrepreneurial environments, left in nature so to speak, are simply more fluid, have less structure, and can easily revolve more around the words of one or more leaders than any other environment. Openness, engagement, and transparency are essential to building success.

Conversations that are IN-PERSON

Before I say anything else, let me implore you to forget technology when it comes to having real conversations with anyone on your team. Technology has probably done more to undermine human conversation than anything ever invented and certainly is the root of many misunderstandings and misconceptions – and certainly has the potential to be a culture killer! The rules of thumb are:

• If you are just exchanging information related to a process or project – dates, times, progress update that is fact-related, etc. – then by all means use email if you which provides documentation as well.
• If you are discussing anything else really – meet in person or at a minimum on the phone. 80%+ of all communication is non-verbal, so if you can’t see each other you are only communicating less than 20% of the information required.
• Try and use Skype video (or other video) if you have to communicate remotely so that you can look at each other while talking.

Conversations that “Hear” Others

The first goal of an entrepreneur in any conversation should be to hear others (I purposefully did not use the word “listen”). I see the risk of failure rise exponentially for entrepreneurs who fail to hear what others (e.g., customers, employees, spouses) are saying.  You want your conversations to engage your team in a way that each person knows you care about what they have to say, you consider their ideas, and that you truly value what they have to contribute as part of the decision process. So, my quick tips for this goal would be:

• In each conversation, consider how you can actively draw out ideas, feedback, and opinions of those involved.
• Try not to speak on an issue first, but instead invite others to share before you do (they tend to hear your words as a decision).
• Ask more questions vs. making statements (as a test, try having a conversation where you ONLY ask questions – you will see a difference)
• If you really don’t have time for a conversation, don’t start it – plan for another time when you can focus and allow enough time for others to be heard.
• When listening, work hard to stop thinking of you own view or reply – stay focused on what the speaker is saying and feeling.
• Don’t use phrases that shut people down, like – “oh, we’ve tried that before.”
• Use your eyes to watch people’s faces and body language – you can see whether they are engaged and trusting, or whether they feel frustrated and unheard.

 Conversations that are Positive

Like it or not, you are the head cheerleader of your business and your team. There is simply not room for negative energy and negative conversation in an entrepreneurial environment. I am not talking about NOT confronting performance issues or failing to address any issue. However, I am talking about an approach that maintains positive momentum in the organization. What are my tips for conversations that accomplish this goal?

• Do not show fear of failure or doubt to your team. You can’t hide slow market conditions or issues in sales, or even your own frustration at times, but you can approach things in a “here is what we are going to do to address challenges” manner.
• Stay focused on “working the plan” – meaning, staying focused on discussing those actions that move forward and discussing progress and outcomes.
• Praise team members in public, and offer constructive criticism in private and in-person (not on the phone or in email).
• Try never to use the word “but.” TRUTH – When you use the word but in a sentence, the person hearing you forgets (disregards completely) EVERYTHING that preceded the word “butt,” and focused on what follows that word. Since most of the time the structure is “something positive” + “but” + “something your listener views as negative,” you will leave negativity hanging in the air.
• Eliminate negative people (e.g., whiners, complainers, gossipers, liars) from your team quickly (do not hesitate).

Conversations that focus on “what” not “how”

Keep your side of conversations focused on the destinations – the what – the outcome, not by telling people how to do things. This will engage your team in action vs. training them to wait until you tell them how to do things. This will be hard for some of you. You find comfort in being involved in the “how” because you find leading the business challenging. It’s just easier to still “do” the work vs. leading the work. Focusing on “what” you want your team to deliver creates a fertile environment for an engaging culture. So, to accomplish this there is just a short list of tips:

• Focus your words in conversations on “what” you need delivered.
• Answer questions about the “how” as needed, if asked.
• When speaking with a team member or members, remember that if something is not getting done then either (a) the person does not understand what is needed, (b) the person needs more training to accomplish their task, or (c) you have the wrong person for the job (and need to adjust). Ask questions to find out which!

Conversations that do not Violate Trust or Alienate

• Be fully present in a conversation. Others can tell if you are patronizing them with time and really are distracted.
• Speak adult-to-adult – you are not a parent to those that work for you. Doing that may feel good at times but “helicopter parents” your team to mediocrity.
• Do not tell inappropriate jokes or make inappropriate comments that undermine your position of trust.
• Demonstrate that you make decisions that are consistent and align with core values (e.g., if you have honesty as a core value – they don’t hear you talking about how to cheat on taxes, or how to subvert a non-compete, or how to mislead a customer – they see every core value lived in your words and actions/decisions)

You are the “ringer” in the Elevator

There is a famous “Candid Camera” video called Prudential: Everybody’s Doing It. The video is funny, of course, but more importantly offers you a demonstration of the power of your words. In the video, the “ringer” supplied by the Candid Camera team simply faces another way each time, turns, and such, all with great confidence and ease. What happens shows human nature in terms of aligning with a leader.

Your words, your conversations, provide the direction that others will face in your elevator. If you have some that simply don’t WANT to face that way with you, then just let them find another place to work that offers them what they want. I am not advocating hiring lemmings at all. I am advocating that you surround yourself with people that share your values. Hopefully, you also have a value that says it’s okay to speak up, to challenge the status quo, to offer new ways of thinking. Get that aligned in your elevator with your other core values and enjoy the ride!